What is Mentoring

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Heart Rhythm Therapy

Mentoring must be the oldest form of teaching, and the most authentic, as it is a direct transfer of skills and wisdom from one person to another. Spiritual schools have always used mentoring as the means of teaching a complex and experiential subject -- human transformation. But mentoring is also fundamental to all kinds of education, including management, sales, nutrition, athletics, arts and science. At IAMheart, mentoring is something we are very proud of, our answer to the need for individual guidance on the path of life.

As mentoring has been studied and developed, it has become clear to us that different aspects of human growth are occurring in three different time-frames, short, medium and long-term. People quickly learn how to accomplish things by using their bodies, reason, and experience, and applying their emotional energy. More slowly, we learn about ourselves, the nature of the world, and how the two interact. Over a long time, we develop a character that we are proud of, that embodies what we have done and learned. We do, we learn, and we become.

Short-Term - Accomplishment

There is a short-term, immediate situation, the "Pressing Need", that provides strong motivation for the training the mentor is offering. This area must be addressed to give the mentee relief and demonstrate the efficacy of the teaching. If one goes to a doctor with a sore arm, for example, the doctor must address this pain before going further into the patient's health. Unlike a doctor, a mentor does not fix the problem directly, but rather sees the issue before the mentee as a stimulus for internal growth.

The Pressing Need may be of four kinds: to create (1) valuable achievements, (2) deep and meaningful relationships, (3) strong physical/mental vitality, or (4) a greater spiritual connection.

  • The aim of conventional therapy is two-fold: to restore a person's ability to work productively and love sincerely.
  • David McClelland identified three motivations: to achieve, to affiliate (build relationships), and to control (including self-control and self-regulation, essential for health).
  • Abraham Maslow identified a five-tier hierarchy of needs including psysiological health and safety, love and belonging, esteem, especially through achievement, and self-actualization (spiritual connection).

So there is general agreement that people's needs can be classified into a few categories. What makes a need "pressing" is some person or situation that demands a short-term resolution.

If we consider that a person is defined by what they (1) do, what they (2) know and who they (3) have become, this work with the Pressing Need falls is the area of DOING. We resolve the Pressing Need by doing something that can be done relatively quickly, in a few months at most.

In our method, the Pressing Need is resolved by tuning and strengthening the energetic heart of the mentee. (Therefor, IAMheart mentoring is in the new field of "Energy Psychology.") We have well-developed and proven practices to expand the energetic dimensions of the heart, and to energize the other six centers of the human energetic system as well. These energetic adjustments, monitored for biofeedback, can take effect in a matter of months.

It is the first priority of the mentor to teach and prescribe methods of breath, posture, attention, visualization, self-produced sounds and invocations that will energize the mentee's body, mind and heart such that the Pressing Need is resolved through personal growth.

A change in behavior necessary to resolve the Pressing Need occurs naturally as the human energetic system is adjusted. We see that the purpose of challenge and stress in our lives is to act as a growth stimulant, to require that people learn how to operate their energy systems. When you have a series of Pressing Needs that you are able to resolve by energetic self-regulation, it becomes clear that humans are indeed energetic beings who have the ability to manipulate energy to satisfy their heart's desires.

Medium-Term - Realization

In the medium-term, a mentor would look at why the mentee gets into the same kind of problems or needs over and over. A doctor, for example, would want to look at risky behaviors that might be leading to recurring illness. A therapist might look at the deeper needs a person has that lead to emotional patterns. An IAMheart mentor considers a person's "realization" and how it would naturally produce the circumstances and attitude toward those circumstances that a person has.

People have the kinds of problems they have because of the way they see and understand themselves, others, and the relationship between themselves and others. This is called "Realization", and it develops in nine steps; each step of realization gives one certain advantages and challenges. Realization can progress by the study of the nature of self, society and the world. Everyone is engaged in this study throughout their lives, some more consciously than others. By understanding the sequence of realizations, a mentor is able to serve as a developmental coach, up to their own realization.

In trying to help others, the mentor must consider each person's level of realization: what do they KNOW, what do they believe, and what basic concepts do they understand? Preaching is not effective; we share our methods for uncovering the most sacred and profound experiences that a human being can have, and let each person form their own beliefs. One can't learn much about relationships until one has fallen in love, and one's conceptions of energy depend on direct experiences of energy. Only by extraordinary experience can one come to extraordinary realization.

It is the mentor's responsibility to accurately assess the mentee's realization and to present those exercises that will inspire and enable the mentee to take their next step.

It is a great blessing for our school to have a clear description of the nine steps of realization and the means of their assessment, in the book, Follow Your Heart, the Map to Illumination, by our co-founders, Puran and Susanna Bair.

Long-Term - Character

In order to help a person become all that they can be, the mentor needs to see what kind of person they are, essentially. The path of development is quite different for an artist than for a scientist or a warrior or a king. In personal development it cannot be that one-size-fits-all.

It is not enough to know one's true nature; the ultimate challenge is to demonstrate this truth in one's life. In most spiritual schools, attaining realization is the aim, often called "awakening" or "enlightenment." But in the path of the heart we must go further, to show our realization in our personalities, becoming an embodiment of love, harmony and beauty, each in our own way.

Over the long-term, the mentor helps the mentee to build their character, to become the best possible example of the kind of person they are. A mentor will study the 12 archetypes of human character, as they present in one's personality, emerge in spiritual maturity, and exist perfectly in one's soul. These archetypes are energetic-based, so they can be identified in every kind of behavior including one's walk and voice quality.

The responsibility of the mentor is to help the menteee recognize and appreciate their archetype and develop it fully through three levels of character maturity. This is the area of BEING.

IAMheart mentoring may be applied in any organization or social structure. In business, for example, a person learns how to analyze problems, apply effort and get results; that is the first area, and it is developed first. Then one learns how one's underlying assumptions create problems, and how wisdom can resolve situations with very little effort. But the truly great business-people go beyond doing and knowing to being: they embody their business, and their total integrity is what attracts customers and holds alliances together. The mentor guides their mentee through all three areas, not just to become successful, but to become success itself.

The training in mentoring would benefit a parent, care-giver, educator, manager, therapist, and anyone who works with others, for every moment in a relationship of any kind is an opportunity for mentoring. Mentoring has become an important part of career development, as it has always been vital to personal development. A new profession, called "Life Coach" has emerged to meet the need of an integrated approach to health, relationships and accomplishments. Our mentoring program has contributed to this new field the underlying theory of adult development through specific steps and archetypes, and a set of practices that operate the transformation, all integrated with the universal path of spirtual growth.

Graduates of this program could apply their knowledge and skill to therapy for individuals, couples, families, and organizations. Some graduates may become mentors of IAMheart members, where the mentees would be provided by IAMheart.

We bring to the mentoring relationship a set of diagnostic and developmental tools:

  • A model of the heart and its development, from wounded, pessimistic and hidden, to the illuminated state.
  • An ability to recognize the five mystical stages of extraordinary experience that develop extraordinary abilities.
  • A map of the nine steps of the path that determine how a person understands and interpretes their life.
  • A system of twelve archetypes of the soul, the heart, and the personality.
  • A description of the ideal of a noble character, in three stages.
  • Experience with a set of practices that develop the heart, the mystical states, the next step of realization, the next phase of emotional development and the next stage of character.

The IAMheart mentors are trained in both diagnosis and prescription: diagnosis of the energetic state of the heart, the level of realization and the archetype of the person's character, and prescription of a range of practices taken from the Egyptian, Hindu, Buddhist, Zorastrian, Jewish, Christian and Islamic traditions, and current research.