Energize Your Heart - Introduction

From Puran Bair

My father has a few months left to live. Lung cancer has claimed one lung already and his remaining lung is crippled with emphysema. He can hardly talk: his breathing is labored and his voice is clouded, yet he speaks more sweetly than he ever did in his life. In the last two years we've become closer than we ever were before.

Dad's emotional heart has opened. How I wish it had happened decades earlier, for him and everyone that knew him. We all would have benefited from the years we might have had of knowing the man he is becoming now. Now, when I talk with him, he asks about my children. He remembers the details of their lives and has a genuine caring about their progress. He is generous with his time, giving to his visitors the precious little breath he has left. But what touches me most about Dad now is his sweetness and openness. He smiles a lot. He still gets angry when he's afraid or confused, same as always, but now he admits it's his own feelings, which are not the fault of the Catholics, Jews or politicians. He is self-deprecating in a gentle way instead of the self-denigrating way he used to have. He is altogether lovable, and he has more real friends, people who care for him, than he ever had.

The event that changed him was traumatic; it happened four years ago. On their 50th wedding anniversary, my mother was in the hospital, unconscious, in the last stages of a pneumonia she had contracted just a week before, and dad was holding the plastic flowers he had brought to her, the only flowers the hospital would allow him to have in her room. Dad cried all that day; I had never seen my father cry before. His wife died a few days later. That was the moment of dad's opening, and he cried inconsolably for months. Eventually his grief abated, but the tenderness has stayed.

From our work with Heart Rhythm Practice, the subject of my first book, Living from the Heart, Susanna and I have gained an understanding of the process by which a person's heart heals, opens and ministers to others. We see that dad's heart is opening in different dimensions: his accommodation and concern for others is the width of his heart, his vulnerability and tenderness is the depth of his heart, and his generosity is the forward thrust of his heart. We see, too, that there are wounds in his emotional heart that are still healing, and the inner dimension of his heart is still fragile. If he has time left for these further developments, they will erase his fear and allow him to radiate peace into the hearts of those he loves.

I believe everyone's heart is continually trying to develop its richness and make its greatness known. The heart tries to communicate to us its innate wisdom, for which it doesn't have words. What the heart does have is an enormous magnetism by which it can attract people and situations into our lives to teach us what it knows. But people don't like to be taught, and even less to surrender, preferring the way they know to the way they grow.

My prayer has been to be able to consciously assist the progress of my heart's development. I want to develop that sweetness, kindness and generosity my father has finally come to, before my heart needs to resort to grief to get my attention. I want to grow and change quickly enough that I will have time to be of some use to others. I also want my heart's healing so that its creativity and courage can emerge in my life. This is my work, and I hope this book helps others do the same.

From Susanna Bair

The most remarkable discovery we've made in our decades of teaching is the effect of conscious, rhythmic, full and balanced breath coordinated with the heartbeat. This is the defining characteristic of Heart Rhythm Meditation, HRM.

The conscious breath is the basis of all meditation. Dr. Andrew Weil, the leading proponent of Integrative Medicine, gives the following statement about conscious breath, which is essential to our method of energizing the heart:

The single most effective relaxation technique I know is conscious regulation of breath.

In many languages the words for spirit and breath are one and the same (Sanskrit prana, Hebrew ruach, Greek pneuma, Latin spiritus). Breathing is the bridge between mind and body, the connection between consciousness and unconsciousness, the movement of spirit in matter. Breath is the key to health and wellness, a function we can learn to regulate and develop in order to improve our physical, mental and spiritual well-being.

Breathing is special in several respects: it is the only function you can perform consciously as well as unconsciously, and it can be a completely voluntary act or a completely involuntary act, as it is controlled by two sets of nerves, one belonging to the voluntary nervous system, the other to the involuntary (autonomic) system. Breath is the bridge between these two systems.

Most people do not know how to breathe so as to take full advantage of the nourishing, health-giving properties of the act of breathing. Knowing how to perform simple breathing techniques can help lower your blood pressure, calm a racing heart, or help your digestive system without taking drugs. Breathing has direct connections to emotional states and moods -- observe someone who is angry, afraid or otherwise upset, and you will see a person breathing rapidly, shallowly, noisily and irregularly. You cannot be upset if your breathing is slow, deep, quiet and regular.

You cannot always center yourself emotionally by an act of will, but you can use your voluntary nerves to make your breathing slow, deep, quiet and regular, and the rest will follow.

While some meditation techniques stop at just making the breath conscious, not changing it at all, Heart Rhythm Meditation follows Dr. Weil's advice to set the breath into a deliberate pattern -- full, rhythmic and balanced -- which then sets the heart into the same rhythm. HRM is the only type of meditation that also makes the heartbeat conscious. This is a powerful way to energize the heart, physically, emotionally and spiritually.

Energizing the heart causes a reworking of the memories and impressions the heart holds as wounds. This is very interesting to me as a therapist and a teacher of therapists. I have seen that working with the dimensions of the heart, in myself and with my clients, gives the ability to control one's mind, in particular with respect to worry, anxiety, fear and low self-esteem. It makes it possible to intervene in the unconscious realms of one's being, which results in a profound emotional and energetic healing.

This is personally very important to me. I had a sister who was mentally ill and I have often wondered how it might have been if my sister could have energized her heart with this method. I wasn't able to help her, but I console myself with the hope that I can help other sisters or brothers of our one family, not only to pull out of mental illness, but to heal energetically their grief from the loss of their mother, father or child, their rejection in love and their guilt and resentments, and come fully to the meaning and purpose of their life.

Energizing your heart goes far beyond healing; it can actually bring forth your greatness, which is far greater than anything you can imagine. What we identify as the "I" is what makes the difference. While people usually identify with their minds, by energizing the heart, the real "I" can be discovered and brought forth. The heart-centered self is much greater and glorious than the mind-centered self. With the heart as the center of identity, the ego is not a problem; it's a resource.

When the Virgin Mary was visited by the angel Gabriel, she exclaimed, "my soul doth magnify the Lord."

Ten years of Catholic school have impressed me with a deep respect for the sacred, which I have tried to make real for myself. I think you'll find that energizing your heart leads to the profound experience, "my heart doth magnify my soul."

In the ten years we've spent helping people to energize their hearts, it's become clear that this is the foundation of a new therapeutic system and a modality for success. This system completes the method of energizing the heart that we started with HRM, taking it beyond meditation, into daily life. As other therapists have come to us to learn these methods, we've all found it not only speeds the process of revelation that occurs slowly in talking therapy, but also provides clients with a tool they can use on their own, to help meet all of life's challenges. Furthermore, it extends therapy far beyond the alleviation of dysfunction to the discovery of the greatness of one's being.

Energizing your heart has proved to be a powerful method to work with both consciousness and energy within the heart; for me, it has been the treasure I sought my whole life. Through meditation on the heart I am able to experience the beauty and power of the soul. Through teaching groups and individuals, I am able to share this treasure with others. I'm so grateful to have the opportunity to share this method with you and I hope the feeling in my heart comes through to yours in these pages.

Background to This Book

The Heart is the Focus

The topic of this book is the heart and the love it contains; we show how to open your heart and fill it with energy. We show how to use the power and tenderness of your heart in many different aspects of life. When we speak of the heart we're referring to a multi-layered center.

The heart is a physical structure performing an essential function in your body -- not only circulating your blood but creating hormones and beating out a rhythm that informs and regulates every aspect of your body.

The heart is the center of your energetic system, through which flows the magnetism and light that powers your physical heart and body, gives rise to your emotions, enlightens your mind, and connects to all other heart energies. We call this the energetic-emotional heart.

The heart is also the core of your self, your inner source, your connection to the Infinite, and the ultimate embodiment of all that you are and all that you become in your life.

We explore the dimensions of the multi-layered heart and develop a language for describing it. Then we present a method of energizing the heart so it can become great -- great in compassion, courage, creativity, vision, cooperation and confidence. All you want in life and all you want to become is a product of your heart.

Physical, energetic-emotional and spiritual -- these are three levels of "heart" that are layered, the latter within the former, and if you give attention to the outer, the inner heart connects with it. Access your physical heart and you'll find energy and emotion. Dive within the inner world of heart energy and emotion and you'll find your spiritual core. The way to the emotional and spiritual heart is through the heart of flesh!

Breath Moves Energy in the Heart

In the work of the heart, we involve and use the body. We work with the body as an instrument of the soul, governed by the heart. Your body is infused with consciousness and energy which create it continually, and your body has an effect on both your consciousness and energy.

When you move energy within your body you can reshape your energetic heart, move emotion, and cause a lasting change in your approach to life. You move energy by the way you breathe, for breath is the essential stream of life. When your breath moves through your chest, it connects your physical body to your energetic and spiritual body; it is the breath that allows you to energize your heart and it is the breath that makes real transformation possible.

You'll see that when your breath touches your heart a wellspring of emotion results that empowers kind, noble, creative and courageous behavior that can truly be called "living from the heart."

A Method with Three Steps

We describe a method of energizing your heart that has three steps:

Recognition: Recognizing the Dimensions of the Heart in yourself and others.

Meditation: specifically Heart Rhythm Meditations.

Application: Activities called "Exercises for Life" that carry the method into everyday life.

This is a beautiful mix of active and passive processes -- at times you'll observe yourself and others and feel the emotion of your heart. At times you'll remember your ideals, aspirations, gratitude and admiration. This inspires your natural creativity and confidence. At other times you're deliberately trying to unfold some of the powers and qualities of your heart that are not often used.

We will present these three steps as if they are done in sequence, but you'll actually do them in concert, as often as you can remember them, as a part of your life that enriches the whole life.

What You'll Find

What will you find when you energize your heart? First, a lot of emotion and energy, some of which might be perceived as pain. Past experiences have been stored in your heart whenever they couldn't be integrated as they occurred, saved for a later time when you would have enough energy and insight to process them. Concentrating on your heart will reveal what has been stored there; then the power of your heart will give you the needed energy and insight to do that inner processing you couldn't do before.

Even if there is discomfort, beneath it is a source of profound happiness, a happiness that needs no reason. Your heart opens more and more as it receives your conscious attention, like a flower that opens one petal at a time. As it opens, you'll benefit from deeper relationships, more meaningful work, greater accomplishments, and improved health.

As you energize your heart you'll find your greatest qualities: lifelong passion, guidance in all things, a compelling vision of your future, compassion, cooperation, confidence and courage. With the power of your heart you will love your life, appreciate your challenges, be optimistic about your difficulties and bring everyone in your life into your embrace. You will experience the integrity of your self; all that you do will demonstrate that integrity.

The next discovery is of your connection to all people, directly, heart-to-heart. Because of this connection you can actually feel in your own heart what another person feels in their heart. This experience may convince you that you have discovered humanity's common resource, the One Heart which all share, and that would be an event of enormous importance. Your discovery of it helps blaze a trail that others may more easily follow.

Then comes the remembrance of a mission, a purpose for your life that was the reason for your birth. This sense of purpose is imprinted into your heart at its creation and when you energize your heart, you find your purpose. To the degree that your purpose becomes your conscious commitment, your heart makes available its reserve of courage and creativity. Your heart has a power that is only available to accomplish your heart's own wish. That power cannot be used for the plans of your mind; all the wonderful qualities of your heart are reserved for, and can be applied to, your unique mission in life.

Safe and Effective Method

As we've developed this method of energizing your heart and seen the changes in ourselves and others who use it, we've witnessed many times that this method is reliable, safe and effective. As you practice these instructions you will indeed feel the effect on your heart. Even without practicing, reading this book will make you familiar with the language and milestones of the process so you will know what your heart is capable of delivering.

To be successful in energizing your heart you'll need a strong method, commitment to a regular practice, a clear underlying theory, and the help of supportive friends and/or a teacher. The practices you'll find in this book will help your determination, and the principles of the heart described here will help you understand your path.

In the path of the heart we do not aspire to the state of consciousness in which there is no personal thought, and beyond that no thought at all; rather, we aspire to an energetic union in which we experience all emotion, and then a spiritual union in which that emotion becomes so much bigger than ourselves that it is truly cosmic. The experience of energizing your heart leads to the ultimate human experience, encapsulated in the mystics' mantra of paradox: "I am a part of all things, and all things are a part of me." This is not an experience of transcendence; it is the experience of the heart enveloped in the Universal Heart which contains all hearts.

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